


All or Nothing

by Chelsea072498



Category: RPF - Fandom, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Accidents, Anxiety, Depression, Eventual Smut, Jared Padalecki - Freeform, Jensen Ackles - Freeform, OFCs - Freeform, OMCs - Freeform, Physical Therapy, Recovery, Serious Injuries, Supernatural RPF - Freeform, set accident
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-05-27 09:47:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 18,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15021965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chelsea072498/pseuds/Chelsea072498
Summary: This story was commission by someone who has asked to remain anonymous.Lindsey Wilburn has been working on Supernatural for several years. After an accident on set leaves her severely injured, her friendships with those around her, especially Jared, are put to the test as she struggles to come to terms with all that's happened.





	1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

 

Lindsey Wilburn walked onto the set very aware that several sets of eyes were on her.

 

“Is my hair sticking up?” She asked Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki when she sat next to them, waiting to be called for the scene. “Did I wear the wrong dress? Is the lipstick not right?”

 

“Relax.” Jensen told her. “You’ve never worn anything like this on set before. It’s just the shock that you’re a woman.”

 

Her dark brown eyes went down to the dress. “It’s just a dress.” The short, red dress fit her body perfectly. She pushed a loose piece of dark hair behind her ear. “It’s not a big deal.”

 

“You are usually in jeans, a tee shirt, flannel, and heavy coat.” Jared pointed out. “How high are those heels?”

 

“Too high.” Lindsey hated heels. “I told Bridget I am probably going to break the heels off before we’re finished.”

 

“You sure? You’re not going to fight for Lila to wear this stuff every episode?” Jensen teased.

 

Lindsey laughed. “If I knew I was coming back for another episode, I’d wear whatever they asked me to.”

 

Her reoccurring role was supposed to be one appearance three seasons prior. She’d returned eight times before the current season and so far had guest starred on eighteen of the twenty three episodes. Jensen and Jared assured her that she’d be back the next season, but Lindsey was never sure.

 

The role of Lila came at a time she needed it the most. Lindsey graduated from high school and instead of going to college or getting a job at the local grocery store, she packed up her run down pick up truck and left for Los Angeles. She was giving herself a year and then would resign herself to whatever work she could find. Her mother told her that if she left, she wasn’t welcomed to come back. Lindsey took that chance anyway. She knew there was something bigger and better out there for her. Lindsey knew she wasn’t going to find it in their small midwest town.

 

Halfway to California, the truck broke down when she broke down in a small Nevada town. She used most of her money to fix the truck and get a room. She managed to find an extra twenty dollars in one of her bags and decided to get a burger before bed. Walking across the street to the bar and grill changed her life.

 

It was karaoke night and no one was willing to give it a go. The waitress explained that the owner started the tall jar on the counter off with two hundred in cash. Customers were welcomed to add to it, and many times the waitresses would put some of their tips in to try and entice people to go for it. The last three karaoke nights had no takers so the jar was pretty full. Lindsey walked to the DJ and signed up.

 

Three songs later, the owner stepped out of his office. He saw the jar passed around and people dropping money in it. Leaning against the wall, he knew he had someone special on the stage. He knew she wouldn’t stay. No one stayed with talent stayed in the small town for long.

 

Lindsey stayed three years though. On her twenty first birthday, Bill, the owner, his wife, and all of the waitresses, bartenders, and cooks gathered together to give her a going away party. Bill kissed the top of her head and told her she better not forget the little people.

 

When she was cast in her first speaking role, she called that old bar and grill. Instead of cheering, there was tears. Bill and his wife died the night before in a car crash. No one wanted to call her until after the audition. They didn’t want her upset before her big day.

 

She didn’t make it back to that small town in Nevada. Lindsey spent five years on daytime and then made a few small films. She was reading new scripts for pilot season when her agent asked her to come and read for a small role on Supernatural.

 

Lindsey had no idea what the show was about or even who the stars were. She would be reading to a room full of suits and if they liked her, she’d be on a plane to Vancouver that evening.

 

Three days later, she filmed her first scenes on Supernatural. She worked with Jensen and Jared, her character a friend from childhood who was trying to locate an old journal that belonged to her family. The men was amazing and told her they couldn’t wait to work with her again. She wasn’t sure that would happen.

 

It did. Several more times than she expected. Lindsey had been brought into the SPN family with open arms. She went to conventions, had her own charities she supported, and loved when she was called to Vancouver.

 

Jensen and Jared didn’t know, but she’d signed a contract for the next season. She would appear in all but three episodes and was directing one. She let go of her apartment in LA and was going to move to Vancouver permanently. She also had reoccurring roles on two other CW shows shot in Vancouver and the network promised she’d have work when her time on Supernatural did come to an end.

 

“We’re ready for this first scene!”

 

The scene was simple. Lindsey’s character was to dance with and try to talk a vampire into stepping outside. Once she got him to follow her, the next scene would be on a roof.

 

“You’re okay with this?” Jared asked Lindsey.

 

“What? Walking across a thin piece of metal that’s being held up by chains? I’m stroked.” She rolled her eyes. “I’ll be okay. I’m going to kick the heels off….”

 

Bob Singer, the director of the episode approached her. “I heard that. You have to wear the shoes. There’s a joke later...”

 

“Shit, I forgot.” Lindsey shook her head. “I’ll be okay.”

 

Jensen reminded them of the safety harnesses. “Linds got this.” He patted her back as she walked away to set up for the scene.

 

“Why aren’t we filming this lower to the ground and adding in everything.”

 

“We want shots from underneath so it looks like she’s really up there.” Bob explained. “We’ll do the bulk lower.”  


“Dave checked the harnesses?” Jared asked.

 

Bob gave him a funny look. “Dave checked. He always does.”

 

Lindsey was at her mark. Jensen noticed the tight, tense look on Jared’s face. “Hey, she’s good. Linds will be fine.”  


“Did you see that? She just shook her head when Dave offered her the harness.”

 

“She’ll be fine.” Jensen assured him. He tried to catch Lindsey’s eyes, to send her a message to wear the harness, but he understood. It would create more work for everyone with the harness involved. Jensen refused to use it most of the time, but he was usually not that high in the air.

 

Dave looked at Lindsey. “You need to wear this, Linds. It’s higher than usual and I don’t like this set up.”

 

“The mats are down there...”

 

“Wear the harness, please.”

 

Linds nodded and saw Jensen and Jared’s faces. They looked nervous. She shook her head and winked. The actor playing the vampire was ready, his harness checked again for safety.

 

“And...action!”

 

The actor jumped on the beam and it swayed slightly. Jared saw the cameramen move under the set up. He looked up to see Lindsey, still wearing the impossible heels, step onto the moving beam.

 

“I don’t like this.” Jared mumbled.

 

Jensen didn’t either, but he had to stay calm for Jared and Lindsey. “She’ll be fine. She’s in the harness.”

 

At that moment, the vampire jumped off the beam, his right foot kicking the beam, already swaying more than anyone would like. Lindsey lost her balance and kneeled to hold the beam.

 

“Cut!” Bob screamed. “Linds, hang on!”

 

She nodded, but slowly stood as the beam slowed down. She inched her way toward the side. Without thinking, she looked down and become dizzy. She felt her body began to sway. She stopped for a moment before continuing her trek to the side.

 

She took a step, but her foot missed the beam. Jared screamed her name as she slipped on the metal and landed hard on her back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lindsey is rushed to the hospital after a terrible accident on set.

**Chapter Two**

 

“Clif, drive faster, man!” Jared leaned forward over the seat. “Come on!”

 

“I’m going as fast as I can, Jared.” Clif looked back at Jensen. “You have to stay calm. Linds needs you both to stay calm.”

 

Clif pulled into the hospital parking lot and stopped in front of the door. Jared jumped out and ran in before Jensen could stop him.

 

“We’re here for Lindsey Wilburn. Where is she?” Jared asked.

 

The nurse sensed his panic. “Miss Wilburn is being examined by Dr. Thompson. I’ll show you where you can wait for the doctor.”

 

Time moved slowly as they were led to a private waiting room. Clif came in with several cast and crew members. Someone put the call out and everyone rushed to the hospital to wait for news.

 

Jared paced the pale green room. He was jumpy, jittery, and the panic was written all over his face. Jensen walked to him and put his hands on his shoulders.

 

“Deep breaths, Man. Come on, Jared.” Jensen looked into his eyes. “You have to calm down. Lindsey needs us focused. When she wakes up, she’s going to be scared. She needs us calm.”

 

“Jensen, you saw her.” Jared closed his eyes. “You saw how she was….What if she doesn’t make it? What if she does and she’s...”

 

“We’ll help her. We’ll support her. Linds is hurt. It’s pretty bad. We know that. Whatever happens, we’re going to be by her side.” Jensen pulled him into a hug.

 

“I need to...her family.” Jared stopped. “I don’t know how to get a hold of them.”

 

“Debra might have that information.” Jensen said. “I’ll go call and see what I can find out. I need to call Danneel and let her know what’s going on.”

 

Jared continued to pace after his best friend left. Everyone wanted to comfort him, but they all knew that until a doctor gave them more information, nothing anyone said would keep him calm.

 

It felt like forever before a doctor appeared in the door. Jared ran to him. “How is she? Is Linds awake?”

 

“She’s been unconscious since she was brought in,” the doctor said. “Lindsey’s back is broken in three places. She’s going to need surgery to repair the damage.”

 

“Okay. Is the surgery dangerous?” Jared asked.

 

The doctor took a deep breath. “Two of the injuries can be repaired easily. One will be a little more difficult to get to. The surgery will take several hours because we have to be extremely careful. We need her emergency medical contact to sign the papers.”

 

“That’s me.” Jared saw several eyes move to him. “She didn’t know anyone else at the time and Jensen wasn’t there.” He was glad he agreed now.

 

“I’ll need you to come with me.”

 

Jared nodded and silently followed the doctor. He was handed several papers and signed them quickly.

 

“How long will she need to heal?” Jared wanted to know.

 

“Her back will take a few weeks after the surgery. She’ll have a brace and will need constant help until she’s able to move on her own.”

 

“Move?”

 

“We won’t know until after the surgery and she’s awake, but there’s a possibility Lindsey won’t be able to walk right away.”

 

Jared felt sick to his stomach. “Will she be able to walk again?”

 

Dr. Thompson turned and looked at Jared. “I believe that she’ll need physical therapy, but she should walk again. I’m saying this based off what her X-rays have shown so far. I have performed surgeries and found more damage than expected, but I don’t expect that this time.”

 

“She could wake up and be able to walk?”

 

“That would be a miracle, but it’s possible, if the damage isn’t as serious as it seems. I suspect, and again, this is based on the X-rays, that Lindsey will have numbness while her back is healing. She won’t be able to feel anything in her lower body. Her range of motion with her arms may be limited with the brace, but she may not need it for too long.”

 

“She can’t stay by herself.” Jared said, more to himself. “She’ll never be able to get around the apartment….”

 

The doctor nodded. “You may want to consider alternatives until she’ll be able to stay by herself. Alice, come over here. Alice can give you the information you’ll need. There are facilities she can live in until she’s able to care for herself, private nurses...”

 

“She’ll be staying with me.” Jared said. “She doesn’t have any family in Vancouver. I have a one story...”

 

“Alice can give you some information.” Dr. Thompson said. “I’m going to the OR.” He touched Jared’s shoulder. “I’ll take good care of Lindsey.”

 

“Thanks. Thank you.” Jared watched him go and then spoke to the nurse for several minutes. He took all of the information she offered and turned to see Jensen standing close by.

 

“She might not be able to walk, Jensen.” Jared told him everything.

 

“Lindsey’s strong, Jared. She’s a fighter. Whatever happens, she’ll fight her way back.” Jensen knew that. He had no doubts Lindsey would be back on set by next season.

 

They joined the others. Jared let everyone know what was going on and the waiting began. Some made coffee runs, some left, promising to return the next morning, but Jared paced. Jensen called his wife and told her he was staying until Lindsey was out of surgery. He knew Jared wasn’t leaving until they knew Lindsey was okay.

 

“I knew something was going to go wrong.” Jared told Jensen when they were the only ones left. “What the hell was everyone thinking?”

 

“She was in the harness. She should have stopped and let them lower her. This was an accident. A terrible accident.” Jensen took a deep breath. “Bob said they’re going to halt everything until next week.”

 

“How kind.” Jared stood up and started pacing again. Jensen watched his best friend and wondered why he never saw this until his wife pointed it out. Jared’s concern for Lindsey wasn’t new, but this particular level of concern was.

 

Hours passed before the doctor returned. Clif had just arrived with fresh coffee and food he knew would possibly go to waste but he promised Danneel he’d try and make the men eat something.

 

“How is she?” Jared rushed to the doctor. “Is she awake? When can I see her?”

 

“Everything went perfectly. The damage was as bad as I predicted. There’s a small chance that Lindsey won’t experience a widespread numbness as I originally suspected.”

 

“What’s that mean?” Jensen asked.

 

“One of the minor breaks I mentioned was not that bad. It was higher in her back and I think it’ll heal quicker than the two in her lower back. The other minor break wasn’t a break at all. We picked up bone from the big break on the X-ray.”

 

“When she wakes up, we’ll know how bad it is?” Jensen asked.

 

Dr. Thompson nodded. “Lindsey was very lucky. She hit her head, but it wasn’t serious at all. She’s sedated and won’t wake up until tomorrow. She’s in recovery now and will be moved into a private room soon. I urge you to all go home, get some rest, and come back in the morning. She’s going to sleep peacefully tonight.”

 

Jensen touched Jared’s shoulder. “She’s going to be okay.”

 

“I want to see her.”

 

“You will. Tomorrow.” Clif stepped forward. “Jared, it’s time to go. They’ll call you if she wakes up. She’s in good hands.”

 

The doctor nodded. “If Lindsey wakes up, we will call. I promise you that. Tomorrow, she’ll be allowed one person to stay with her overnight. We’re going to keep her here a few days before she’s released.”

 

“I’ll stay.” Jared stayed.

 

“Not tonight.” Dr. Thompson said. “Go home, get some rest. If there’s anything Lindsey might like to have with her, anything that may make her feel better, please bring it. Within reason, of course.”

 

It took a few minutes to get Jared to leave, but he slowly followed Jensen and Clif to the car. Jensen offered to stay with him, but Jared shook his head.

 

“I’m going to take a shower and sleep.” Jared lied. “I’ll meet you at the hospital around eight? Visiting hours start at nine, so we’ll be able to go to her room as soon as they let us.”

 

“I can drive you.” Jensen offered.

 

“No, it’s good. I got this. Thanks, yall.” Jared got out of the car and slowly walked to his front door. Once inside, he finally looked at the clock. It was after two in the morning. Was it possible that sixteen hours earlier, he was sitting in the make up trailer, laughing and joking with Jensen about a movie they saw the night before.

 

He sat on his couch and thought about Lindsey. Over the years, she had become one of his closest friends. Lindsey sat up late at night with him when he was going through tough times. She took care of him when he become ill during one of their overseas con.

 

She was always there for him when he needed her and it was his turn to be there for her. He reached for his laptop and started his research. He turned the light on and read the information the nurse gave him at the hospital. He made a list of things he needed to call about the next day and then walked into his guest room and began to move things out of the room. Three hours later, he knew it was just the start of what he’d need to do, but whatever it took, he was going to make sure that Lindsey was comfortable when he brought her home to heal.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lindsey wakes up in the hospital with Jared and Jensen by her side.

**Chapter Three**

 

Jared showered and dressed before seven o’clock. He was running on adrenaline and coffee. Lindsey should wake up soon, he told himself. He wanted to be there when she opened her eyes.

 

The nurses informed him he was early. They encouraged him to go get some coffee, breakfast, fresh air, anything to keep him occupied until visiting hours began. He walked to a vending machine and grabbed a coffee before sitting down and fixing his eyes on the clock above the nurses station.

 

A few minutes later, a familiar face appeared. Alice came in for her shift and saw Jared sitting alone.

 

While checking charts, she looked at him. “Did you go home, Mr. Padalecki?” He nodded. “You didn’t sleep, did you?” He shook his head. Alice looked around and motioned for him to follow. “Come on. I know what you need.”

 

She led him to Lindsey’s room and smiled. “I just checked her chart. She’s slept through the night, vitals look good. Dr. Thompson talked to you after the surgery?” He nodded. “When you have a chance to look over the information I gave you...”

 

“I did. I have to make some calls and get some things around my place taken care of for her. I have a list of places to call once she’s awake and our friend is here to sit with her. She lives alone, in a townhouse on the other side of town. There’s no way she can stay by herself right away.”

 

“You’re a good friend.” Alice smiled at him as she opened the door. “I’ll bring your friend back if I see him.”

 

“Thank you.” Jared stared at the dark haired beauty in the bed. Lindsey always looked so sweet and peaceful when she slept. He pulled a chair next to her bed and took her hand. “Hey, Linds, I’m here.” He squeezed her hand. “I know this was an accident. It was a terrible accident. They’re looking into what happened because every safety precaution was taken. You were both in harnesses, there were mats on the ground...” He rambled on for a few minutes before pulling his phone out and turning on music. “I know you like this song. They’re going to be here in concert next year. I think Jensen said March, maybe April. I’ll check and get us a couple of tickets. Kim called. I didn’t get to talk to her, but she sends her love and says she’ll visit you when she flies in next week.  


Jared talked for two hours about everything and nothing. He held her hand the entire time. Jensen arrived with fresh coffee and bags of food, but Jared’s attention didn’t leave Lindsey. Jensen sat opposite of him.   


“She’s slept the whole time?” Jared nodded. “That’s good. Her body needs the rest.”

 

“I just need her to wake her. I need to hear her voice and know she’s...” Jared stopped. “I may need some help. I started moving things around last night. Linds is going to stay in my guestroom. I want to move some of the heavier furniture out so there’s room for her.”

 

“Yeah, sure.” Jensen nodded.

 

Jared felt her hand move and looked into her face. She blinked a few times and stared at him for several seconds.

 

“Linds? Hey, we’re here.”

 

“Did they get it?”

 

“Get what, Sweetheart?” Jensen asked.

 

“Did they….get the scene?”

 

Jensen and Jared looked at each other, shocked. Their eyes moved back to Lindsey. “Linds...”

 

“Well, did they?” A small smile appeared on her lips.

 

Jensen laughed first. Lindsey joined him. It took Jared a few seconds to laugh with them.

 

“What happened? I remember a little….”

 

Jensen told her everything, from their viewpoint. Jared felt her hand squeeze his tighter as Jensen talked. Jared looked at her and saw tears.

 

“Are my toes moving? I’m trying to move them.”

 

Jared looked toward her feet but he saw no movement. “Jensen, will you find a doctor?”

 

“Yeah, I saw Dr. Thompson when I came in.” Jensen jumped up and raced to find him.

 

“It’s going to be okay, Linds. We’re here.” Jared tried to reassure her.

 

“I can’t move my toes, Jared.” Lindsey was trying not to cry. “I can’t move my legs. I’m in a brace.”

 

Dr. Thompson entered with Jensen behind him. “Mr. Padalecki, could I have a moment with Lindsey to go over everything?”

 

“You okay with that?” Jared asked Lindsey.

 

She nodded. “I’m a big girl, Jare. Go buy me a teddy bear or something.” She winked.

 

Jared squeezed her hand one more time before leaving the room.

 

“She’s scared.” Jared said.

 

“Wouldn’t you be?” Jensen asked quietly. “The last thing she remembers is working on set. She may not remember slipping or falling, at least not yet. She was working and suddenly wakes up almost twenty four hours later in a hospital bed.” He managed a small smile. “And she had to wake up to the two of us!”

 

Jared actually laughed. “I get it. I do. She’s never looked so scared, or so young before. Linds is a force. She just looks like a scared little girl though.”

 

Jensen nodded. “It’s going to be harder on her than most people. This would destroy a lot of people. Linds is so independent that she’s going to feel like it will destroy her. She’s going to be stubborn and push people away, but eventually, she’ll kick it in the ass.”

 

Jared nodded. “Of course she will. She’ll have us.”

 

Jensen knew he had to bring up something else. “Someone reported that there was a serious injury on set. No one has commented. CW plans to release a statement this morning, but didn’t want to announce it was Linds. I thought that maybe you and I could do a live video together. We don’t have to go into details but people are already jumping to conclusions. Someone saw us leaving the hospital, so they know it’s not one of us. Misha, Mark, and Linds are all top of the list.”

 

“Let’s do it now.”

 

“Before the network?”

 

“Yeah.” Jared led him outside and sat down on a bench. “You ready?” Jensen nodded.

 

Jared started streaming and waited until there were a few people in the stream before he spoke. “I know there’s some rumors flying around about what happened on set yesterday. There was an accident and someone was seriously injured. Lindsey Wilburn, who plays Lila, was hurt during filming. Every safety precaution was taken beforehand, but accidents do happen. I don’t want to discuss her injuries yet, but keep her in your thoughts and prayers.”

 

“Linds is a fighter and she’s going to get through this.” Jensen added. “She’s awake and with her doctor now, so we wanted to update everyone and let yall know what’s going on.”

 

“Linds may not feel up to doing much for a few days, but when and if she’s ready, please show her the kindness and love you’ve always shown us.”

 

They spoke for a few minutes, answered a few innocent questions and thanked everyone. Jared ended the stream and they spent a couple of minutes sharing the link on their twitter accounts.

 

“She wants a teddy bear.” Jared said.

 

“Oh, does she?” Jensen smiled. “Let’s go get the lady a teddy bear.”

 

When they walked back into her room, they saw Lindsey staring into space. “Linds?”

 

She wiped the tears away from her face. “Six teddy bears?”

 

“All for you.” Jensen set three down next to her. He kissed the top of her head. “I know it’s a lot to process.”

 

“Is it though? I can’t feel my legs. Eventually, the numbness will subside. Maybe.”

 

“It will.” Jared moved next to her. “You’ll have to have physical therapy, but you’ll be walking again in no time.”

 

“What if I don’t?”

 

“You will.” Jared looked into her dark brown eyes. “Linds, you’ll be walking again before you know it.”

 

“We don’t know that. Even the doctor said that there’s a chance I might never walk again.”

 

“He felt differently last night.”

 

“I wasn’t awake to answer questions.” Lindsey cried. “He had to do an examination and I don’t remember! He said a lot of things that didn’t make sense. I heard the most important words though. I may never walk again.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

 

Jared spent as much time as possible at the hospital over the next few days. Boxes from different online vendors were arriving at his house everyday and he was anxious about whether everything would be ready for Lindsey when she was released.

 

The network wanted to meet with Jensen and Jared about how to proceed. The writers had an idea, but they were worried that it would seem insensitive.

 

“You’re going to say she disappeared between the club and roof?” Jared asked.

 

“We aren’t going to use the footage of the accident in the show.” Bob said. “The network suggested it but I made it clear that most of us would walk if they exploited what happened to Linds.”

 

“Damn right we would walk.” Jensen said. “Character disappearances is the easy way out, but I think in this situation, it might be the most appropriate.”

 

“Lindsey thought so. We talked to her about it yesterday. Actually, she called us about it.” Bob saw Jared’s face. “We’re going to find a way to keep her in the show. She’s….not very optimistic but we are. She’ll be back.”

 

Jared shut down for the rest of the meeting. He knew Jensen would fill him in later. After a few minutes, Jensen nudged him.

 

“We’ve got a call with Creation.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Apparently they want to know how to proceed. Linds was supposed to be at several cons coming up for all three days. Adam wanted to try and find a way to help her with the medical bills she’s going to have.” Jensen yawned.

 

“We can figure this out later.” Jared stood up. “I can’t be here right now.”

 

“Sure, okay.” Jensen warned Adam that Jared might not want to talk about that yet. They still had a few weeks before the next convention Lindsey was to attend. “We can pick Linds up some lunch and see if there’s anything else she’s going to want from her place.”

 

“Did she seem angry about staying with me?” Jared asked.

 

Jensen shrugged. “It’s hard on her. She’s been on her own for a long time. How would you feel if you suddenly needed someone to help you with the simplest of tasks? Lindsey hasn’t relied on people for anything major since she was eighteen. This is going to be hard for her.” Jensen repeated the words he already said a million times. “We have to be patient. We have to expect some anger. I wouldn’t be surprised if she has some depression.”

 

“Maybe I should call and see if someone can come talk to her.”

 

Jensen considered that also. “I think it would be good for her, but she has to want to talk. You know that. We can’t push her.”

 

“Yeah, you’re right.”

 

They arrived at the hospital with burgers, fries, and shakes. Lindsey’s physical therapist was with her, but it was obvious something was wrong.

 

“Sorry,” Jensen set his bags down. “We’ll come back...”

 

“Don’t leave.” Lindsey gave the therapist a glare. “We’re finished for the day.”

 

“Lindsey, we still have twenty minutes.”

 

“I’m done for the day. Thank you.”

 

The therapist stared her down. “I’m going to come thirty minutes early tomorrow and I’m staying thirty minutes longer than usual. You have to let me help you or it’s going to take longer to get you back on your feet.”

 

“Whatever.” Lindsey grabbed her phone.

 

Jensen gave the therapist a sympathetic look. He had witnessed this a few times with doctors, nurses, and the same therapist. Jared knew it was happening but he didn’t want to think about it.

 

“Double cheeseburger?” Jared asked.

 

“Yes, thanks.” Lindsey accepted the food and her chocolate shake. “The doctor keeps bringing up nurses.”

 

“Private nurses.” Jared nodded. “I thought maybe we could interview a few together. You’ll have final say, but they’ll be coming into my house.”

 

“Jare, I appreciate everything you’re doing, but I can stay at my place.”

 

“Actually,” Dr. Thompson walked in. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Not right away. Give it a month, six week tops, and see how much progress you make.”

 

“I want to go home. My home. My bed...”

 

“You can’t live alone in a townhouse, Lindsey.” Jensen said. “You spend ninety percent of your time upstairs on your balcony.”

 

“I’ll get a stair lift or something.” She snapped.

 

Jared spoke up. “Linds, I’ve got my guest room fixed for you. I’ve ordered some things to help you, I’ve got...”

 

“Jared, you’re my best friend and I love you, but I’m not your responsibility.”

 

“I know that.” Jared said. “You and Jensen are my best friends and I’d do anything to help the two of you. Let me help you.”

 

“I’ll be fine. I’ll call someone...”

 

“Family?” Dr. Thompson asked. He thought it was strange that her family had not come to see her. She never mentioned them.

 

“I have options.”

 

“What about your family?” Jared asked. “Would someone be willing to come and stay with you for a few weeks?”

 

“My family isn’t an option.” She was growing irritated with the questions.

 

Jared stared at her. “What are your options?” She was silent. Jared looked at Dr. Thompson. “She’s staying with me. We need to set up the schedule for therapy and I need to get the information for nurses. I still have a few weeks of filming left before I’ll be home during the week.”

 

“Sure, I’ll get all of that for you.”

 

Jensen’s phone rang and he excused himself. Dr. Thompson told them he’d come back later to check in before he left for the night.

 

“Babe, look at me.” Jared sat next to her. “Lindsey.”

 

“What?”

 

“You’re hurt.”

 

“You think I don’t fucking know that?!” She exploded.

 

“Linds! Calm down. Listen to me. You need help. It’s okay. Everyone needs help at some point in their lives.”

 

“I...”

 

“What is it?”

 

“I’m scared, Jare.” Her tears were fast and furious. “I’m really scared.”

 

He got into the bed next to her and pulled her as close as he could without hurting her. He kissed the top of her head and whispered to her.

 

“I’m scared too, Linds. I’m scared you’re going to try and push everyone out of your life because you’re too stubborn to let us help you.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

 

Jared originally planned to take Lindsey to lunch before bringing her to his home, but she begged him not to.

 

“I can’t, Jared. Not with this damn wheelchair. Not yet.”

 

He respected her wishes and decided they’d order in from one of their favorite places as soon as she got settled. The nurse they agreed on met them at the house and immediately pushed Lindsey back to what would be her room for the duration of her stay.

 

“Jared!” She called.

 

“Linds? Is everything okay?”

 

“You moved everything out? Why?” She asked. “Where did that chair come from?”

 

Jared told her he did research and ordered two chairs, one for her room, one for the living room, because it would help her as she started to stand on her own again. “I also bought several seat cushions, different colors and designs. There’s a seat in the shower for you, and a company is coming at the end of the week to put in some things to help using the bathroom easier.”

 

The nurse, Anita, smiled at Jared. “You’ve thought of almost everything, haven’t you?”

 

“I’m trying.” Jared smiled. “Linds, I’m going to run to the store and then grab some things from Freddy’s. Want anything special?”

 

“No, whatever you grab is good.” She said, her eyes still taking in all the changes in the room.

 

Jared touched her shoulder. “If you think of anything you want, let me know.”

 

“Sure, I’ll text you.” Lindsey looked smaller than normal and lost. Jared reconsidered leaving, but he wanted her to get to know Anita better. He knew that there were things he wasn’t going to be able to help her with.

 

Jared went to several different stores before finishing up at the market closest to his house. He sent a text to Anita telling her he was dropping the groceries off before going back out for a little while. Anita said they were still in Lindsey’s room getting to know each other. She told him Lindsey was complaining about her wheelchair. Jared had wood flooring and tile throughout the house, so Lindsey’s wheelchair would be able to move about freely. Another reason staying in her mostly carpeted home would have been a bad idea.

 

Jared quietly put everything away and left the house again. He stopped at a book store and grabbed Lindsey a few books he knew she hadn’t had time for. He grabbed several adult coloring books and markers for her also. He teased her often about her love of coloring, but he was hoping that she’d find some enjoyment from them now.

 

He stopped by several more places and then finally Jensen’s Vancouver rental. Danneel and the kids were still in town. Danneel was set to film scenes for the last few episodes and her parts were larger now to fill the void with the loss of Lindsey’s character.

 

“How is she?” Danneel asked.

 

Jared shrugged. “She’s scared. We all are. She’ll come around. I know she will. She’s got to adjust to all of this.”

 

“How did she react to the room?” Jensen asked.

 

“I think she was surprised. I don’t think she expected everything I ordered. I just wanted her to be more comfortable. When she’s finished with it, we’ll donate it back to the hospital or something.”

 

“Let’s give it a few days and I’ll come sit with her while you’re on set.” Danneel smiled. “I think that may be good for her. Some girl time. I have a friend who can come and do pedicures and manicures….Oh my God! I didn’t even think about that...”

 

Jared actually laughed. “She was complaining about that earlier. She has to do some of her therapy barefoot and without socks. I guess she had a pedicure scheduled. She was wondering if she could get someone to come to the house and do it.”

 

“I’ll call Paul and see what we can set up.” Danneel promised. “How’s the nurse?”

 

“We both liked her. She’s got over twenty seven years experience. Anita promised that she would allow Linds as much freedom and independence as she could...”

 

“She’s not going to be able to be independent. Not like she wants.” Jensen reminded him. “I didn’t want to bring this up, but Linds hasn’t been open to her therapists.”

 

“She’s weary. I told her we’d look for new ones next week. Steve and Stacy are pushy.”

 

“They’re not pushy, Jare. Linds isn’t doing anything.” Jensen said. “I love Lindsey like a little sister, but she’s shutting down.”

 

“Jay...”

 

“Danneel, you know this. Jared does too. No one wants to say anything because Linds is still trying to sort through it. I get it. I really do. She can’t push those of us away who want to help her. This isn’t going to be easy. I know how much fight she’s got in her. I’m not seeing it though and that scares me.”

 

“She’s been...”  


“Isn’t she the one who always tells you to take a day or two and throw a pity party, but then get your ass up and get back to business? It’s been a week.”

 

“She’s told me that when I’ve broken up with girlfriends or roles didn’t work out. She can’t walk!”

 

“Jared, I don’t want to fight with you. Lindsey is pretty important to all of us. I want to help her, but she’s got to start giving a damn or nothing we do will matter.

 

Jensen’s words stayed with him as he drove home. He messaged Lindsey about dinner, but she claimed she ate and was going to try to sleep.

 

When Jared walked into the living room the next morning, Lindsey was sitting at the table with her laptop and phone.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“I was going to try and post something on social media.” She said. “I don’t know what to say.”

 

“Don’t push yourself.” Jared sat next to her. “Want some breakfast? I have to be on set for about four hours today. I’ll be home around seven.”

 

“That’ll work out. Steve’s coming for therapy soon and then I can take a nap and we can have dinner together.”

 

“Sure. What about breakfast?”

 

“I had some fruit.” Lindsey told him.

 

“What time is Anita coming?”

 

Lindsey was quiet for a minute. “Jare, she’s really nice but it’s not a fit. She went on and on about allowing me independence, but she kept doing things for me.”

  
Jensen’s words played in his head again. “I know you want to take care of yourself, but for now, let people help you. I’ll call Anita and see if she can come back this weekend while I’m here...”

 

“She’s not going to work for me, Jared. She isn’t a fit. This situation isn’t a fit.” Lindsey snapped. “I’m going home. Today.”

  
“Lindsey, you and I both know that’s not going to happen.” Jared tried to take her hand, but she pushed it away. He tried to ignore how much that action hurt him. “Linds...”

 

“I don’t want to depend on people!”

 

The door bell rang and Jared opened the door to the therapist. Steve looked at Lindsey with a half smile. “We going to work today?”

 

“Yeah, sure.” Lindsey sighed. “Go on, Jared. I know you have some things to do on set. You’ve barely been there since….Go take care of your business. I’ll be here when you get back.”

 

“I can call Dee or Briana to come sit with you.”

 

“I’ll be fine.”

 

Steve spoke up. “We’re going to have two sessions today. We’ll break for a little bit between the two. I’ll be here until six or so.”

 

“I’ll be back around seven. I’ll call if something happens.” Jared kissed the top of her head. “You got this.”

 

“Yeah, I know.” Lindsey watched him leave and looked at Steve. “What torture do you have planned for me today?”

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

Jared came in at seven twenty two. He sent texts and called her several times during the day. She promised she was home but every light in the house was off.

 

He flipped a switch and jumped when he saw her sitting in the middle of the living room. “Linds?”

 

“I couldn’t reach the light switch.” She was looking down. “How was work?”

 

“We had to film a few scenes discussing Lila’s disappearance. Jensen and I hate it.”

 

“I don’t think there’s any other way to do it, Jared. I don’t want them to write Lila injured. I really don’t want her dead...”

 

Jared nodded. “I know. I just hate it. Anyway, how was therapy?”

 

“It was fine. I’m tired.”

 

“Dr. Thompson said you might start getting some feeling back once you got into the exercises and stretches. Have you...”

 

“No.” Lindsey shook her head. “I mean, I can’t feel my legs, but Steve thinks that from the nerve damage and not the back.”  
  
“I forgot about that.”

 

“I have enough feeling in my lower body I can actually use the bathroom and not worry about that.” Lindsey recalled the first several days after her surgery. She was relieved that she could at least take care of using the bathroom herself.

 

“You’ve been able to do that without problems? They’re coming the day after tomorrow...”

 

“Yeah, I think that’ll help.” She would give him that much. She was wearing herself out using her arms as much as she had been.

 

“I stopped and grabbed Chinese. I got you some eggrolls.”

 

“I’m not really hungry, but thanks.”

 

“Have you eaten since I left?”

 

Lindsey shook her head. “I’m just not very hungry.”

 

“I’m worried about you. You’ve barely eaten...”

 

“I’m fine! Damn it, Jared, I’m a grown ass woman! I don’t need you to worry about me!”

 

“You’re my best friend, Linds! I’m going to worry about you.”

 

She shook her head. “Please. Don’t.”

 

“Lindsey.” Jared saw her trying to turn the chair around. “I can...”

 

“So help me, if you offer me help, I will slap you across your face.” She snapped. Lindsey managed to get the chair turned around and wheeled down the hall to her room. Jared jumped as she slammed the door.

 

He grabbed his phone and retreated outside. “You’re right about Lindsey. I’m also in over my head. I don’t know what to do, Jensen. I need help.”

 

  



	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

 

Jared grabbed his phone and retreated outside. “You’re right about Lindsey. I’m also in over my head. I don’t know what to do, Jensen. I need help.” He told Jensen everything he hadn’t said since he brought Lindsey home from the hospital. “I want to help her, but she’s refusing.”

 

“Take tomorrow off. Spend the day with her. Watch movies, play board games, keep it as normal as possible. Do things you two used to do.”

 

“I can’t skip out on work.”

  
“I’ll let everyone know Linds needs you. You know Bob will understand. Misha and I can film some of the scenes that we didn’t get to last week. Lindsey needs you, Jare. She needs you as her friend, not her savior or babysitter.”

 

“Yeah, I can do that.” Jared took a deep breath. “Jensen, do you think she’s going to come around?”

 

“Eventually, but I think we’re going to have to give her some tough love first.” Jensen said. “Danneel said she’ll come hang out with her on Monday. My parents are coming for the week so they’ll have the kids.”

 

“I’ll let Linds know. I’m sure she’ll really enjoy some girl time. Thanks, Jensen. I know I’ve been...”

 

“When things settle down, you need to really think about how you feel and where you two stand with each other.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

Jensen rolled his eyes. “If I have to explain that to you, you aren’t ready to hear it.”

 

~*~*~*~

 

Around six in the morning, Jared woke to what he thought was a crash. He shook his it off as a dream and rolled over. A few seconds later, he heard something else and a slew of four letter words.

 

He got out of bed and walked down the hall to the guestroom. He knocked softly before pushing the door open. He saw Lindsey in her wheelchair and several things on the floor behind her.

 

“Sorry.” She mumbled. “I was trying to be careful. I couldn’t see and forgot my phone this time.”

 

“It’s okay.” He walked to her and lifted her.

 

“Jared, I got this!” He ignored her and set her down in the bed. “Jare...”

 

“Accept help, Lindsey.” He moved her chair next to the bed and kissed the top of her head. “Get some more sleep.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Jared knew he wouldn’t fall back asleep. He decided to start marinading some meat for dinner and was in the middle of making coffee when he heard Lindsey’s door open. He smiled. “Hey, Darlin’, want some coffee?”

 

“Please.” She looked exhausted. “Why are you so damn cheerful?” Her hair was in a messy knot on top of her head and Jared wondered when she last changed clothes.

 

“I got the day off. I thought we’d have some breakfast and maybe put a movie on and play some games.”

 

“Oh?” Lindsey’s eyes narrowed. “Why?”

 

“Why what?”

 

“You want to hang out?”

 

Jared was surprised by her question. “Why wouldn’t I?”  


“I….”

 

“Come on, let me make you something to eat. I’ve been practicing my omelets. I know I did a terrible job last time I tried to make one for you.”

 

“Jared, it turned into a scrabbled egg with stuff thrown in.” Lindsey tried not to laugh. “I can...” She stopped. “Honestly, I’m good with cereal. You said you got some frosted flakes?”

 

“Uhh, yeah. I grabbed two boxes. I know you like them.” Jared realized she wanted to cook. “I’ll grab some bowls for us.”

 

They ate their cereal in silence. Lindsey excused herself after asking Jared to find some movies and games. There was a table in the room she was sleeping and she felt more comfortable in there. She didn’t dare tell Jared, but she appreciated that she could move around better without all of the obstacles the rest of the house had.

 

Jared was washing the bowls when he heard her cuss. He smiled to himself, thinking about how normal that sounded for Lindsey. A few seconds later, he realized that something was wrong. He had another crash and raced toward the bedroom.

 

He saw the chair overturned in the bathroom door and Lindsey on the floor. “What the hell happened? Did the chair get caught on something?”

 

“I just want to take a shower! I was trying to lean forward to open the shower door and slipped out of the chair.” Lindsey looked defeated. Jared tried to control the panic he felt and reached for her. “Jared, stop, please!”

 

Jared ignored her and turned back to the shower. He turned the water on, waited until it warmed up and turned around. He started with her socks and then moved to the hoodie. Slowly, he removed all of her clothing, piece by piece, and then lifted her, carefully. He set her in the shower chair and made sure she could reached everything she needed.

 

“Call me if you need help. I’m going to grab movies, games, drinks, and snacks.” His voice was soft and gentle. Lindsey nodded and tried not to cry. This was the ultimate act of friendship, in her mind. Jared was helping her do what was one of the simplest tasks only a week before.

 

A few minutes later, he heard her call his name.

 

“I...I’m having trouble washing my hair.” She looked at him, her huge dark eyes filled with sadness.

 

Jared gave her a small smile and washed her hair for her. He was getting soaked, but he didn’t care.

 

“Do you want me to shave your legs?”

 

“I...not this time.” She couldn’t see how bad it was, but she was already embarassed and mortified that this was happening. “Thank you.”

 

“All you have to do is ask, Babe.” Jared rinsed her hair once more and then turned the water off. He grabbed a towel and dried her off before wrapping it around her and lifting her.

 

“You’re soaked.”

 

“I can change. Let’s get you settled.”

 

A few minutes later, she was wearing a tank top and cotton shorts, laying in her bed. He told her he would be right back and ran to his room to change. When he returned, he saw the tears in her eyes. “Linds?”

 

She wiped her eyes. “Can you just put a movie on?” He popped a DVD in and sat in a chair next to her bed.

 

“What time are Steve and Stacy coming?”

 

“They aren’t coming today.” She told him. “Day off to rest.”

 

“Sounds like you have nothing to do but relax.” He squeezed her hand. “Your drink is over there. I’ve got the snacks right here...”

 

“Thanks. I’m good right now.” She focused on the movie. Jared held her hand while he watched the movie, his mind on everything but the simple plot playing out. He turned to ask her if she needed anything and saw her sleeping. Jared smiled, relieved to see her actually resting. He kept her small hand in his and watched her sleep, wishing he could take all of her pain away.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

 

Danneel arrived early Monday with several bags and a huge smile. “You ready for a day of pampering and relaxation?”

 

“Absolutely.” Lindsey returned her smile. “I’m pretty sure my feet are an absolute mess.” She didn’t mention the fact that Jared had been helping her bath for several days and was now helping her shave. They never talked about it. He just helped her with her showers and then they watched movies until she dozed off.

 

Jared kissed Lindsey’s cheek and hugged Danneel. “You two have fun. Don’t forget to tell Steve that We need to get a set schedule.” Jared knew her therapists would not come on weekends, but they weren’t coming at the times prearranged before Lindsey left the hospital.

 

“I’ll let him know.” Lindsey promised. “Go on, give Mark and Misha my love.”

 

Once alone, Danneel looked at Lindsey. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

 

“Yes. I’m tired of feeling so self conscious every time Jared has to take off or put on socks for me.”

 

“He’s...helping you?” Danneel asked.

 

Lindsey bit her lip. “It’s pretty embarrassing but Jared’s been helping me bathe. I tried to do it myself but my chair flipped.”

 

“Linds, I don’t want to piss you off, but that’s why you guys hired the nurse.”

 

“I know, and she’s a really nice lady, but I wanted to do things for myself and she didn’t think I could.”

 

“Be honest, could you?” Danneel looked at her. “Don’t bullshit me.”

 

“Not all of it, but I might have been able to do some of it.” Lindsey shrugged. “The physical therapy isn’t working.”

 

“You have to be patient with yourself. You can do it, but it’s going to take some time. My cousin was in an accident. He went through this too. It was really hard for him and it took time to get used to things, but eventually, he was able to walk again.”

 

“Really?” Lindsey asked. She wanted to get mad and lash out, but Danneel wasn’t Jared. Danneel was a good friend, but if she pushed her too hard, she may disappear. Lindsey hated herself for the thoughts she was having lately.

 

“I know you aren’t used to things being the way they are, but it’s temporary. You’ve got this. You have to want it though.”

 

“I do. I’m just….I’m kind of a mess right now.”

 

Danneel reached for her hand. “You’re allowed that, Lindsey. I’d be a mess.”

 

“No, you wouldn’t. You’d do everything in your power to get back to where you were before it happened.”

 

“You will too.” Danneel was sure of that. “Paul is going to be here soon. What time is your therapist coming?”

 

Lindsey looked at her phone. “I need to call and find out. I think they have too many clients, really. I need to look for someone who isn’t as busy. They’ve been so inconsistent.”

 

Danneel knew from Jensen that there were other issues, not all because of Lindsey. “I have some more things in the car. Give ‘em a call and I’ll get everything else we need.”

 

Danneel sent Jensen a text to tell him she might be able to get through to Lindsey. Jensen’s thumbs up emoji came back instantly. She knew that Jensen was worried not only about Lindsey, but Jared. It was obvious that there was so much more going on than one best friend caring for another. Danneel told her husband to let it go for now. There was too much going on to throw feelings into the mix.

 

“How much time do we have? Paul cleared his scheduled.”

 

“Steve canceled for the day. We’re going to do extra sessions the next few days he comes to make up for it.” Lindsey told her.

 

Danneel looked at her. “That’s really unprofessional.”

 

“They don’t usually make house calls though. I’m getting special treatment.”

 

“Maybe you shouldn’t.” Danneel helped herself to a water from the fridge. “Getting out a few times a week, even if it’s just for therapy, might be good for you. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re starting to look like something that the guys would be hunting on the show.”

 

Lindsey laughed. “I’ll talk to them about it.”

 

Paul arrived a few minutes later and hauled in several things Lindsey had no idea existed. He was very gentle with her feet, though she really couldn’t tell. Danneel sat next to her with a tablet and they laughed as they looked on several websites. They both placed several orders and Danneel called one of her favorite places to deliver lunch after Paul left.

 

“How are things with you and Jared?” Danneel asked as they watched reality television and ate their lunch.

 

Lindsey shrugged. “It’s okay. I’m intruding. I know that. He’s been amazing. I’m sure he can’t wait to have the place to himself again.”

 

“I don’t know about that.” Danneel laughed. “You were over here a lot anyway.”

 

Lindsey shrugged. “I could leave whenever I wanted. Whenever he wanted.”

 

“The last time we were all here, I didn’t think Jared was going to let you leave...”

 

~*~*~*~

 

“You both seemed really comfortable. Danneel and I left because we thought that you two wanted to be alone.” Jensen smiled at Jared. “It’s pretty obvious sometimes….”

 

“Maybe to you, because we know each other so well, but Linds hasn’t caught on. Probably better that way now.”

 

Jensen nodded. “For now, yeah. Give each other time. Once things settle down, and Lindsey’s in a better place, think about it.”

 

Jared was about to reply when his phone rang. He was surprised when Stacy, one of Lindsey’s therapists, asked if they needed to change days and times for therapy.

 

“Lindsey was supposed to ask about this today. I know you don’t usually do house calls and that staying an extra hour or two is an inconvenience, but the inconsistancy...”

 

“Lindsey has been canceling. She canceled all of the appointments for this week. She said that there was a lot she needed to deal with for work before she could focus. We decided to let her get that settled and hoped it would help clear her mind for later.”

 

“She did what?” Jared listened to everything Stacy was telling him. “I’ll call you back later this evening or tomorrow morning. We’ll get her appointments scheduled and back on track.”

 

“What was that about?”

 

Jared tried not to let his anger show but he couldn’t believe Lindsey had lied to him about this. “Lindsey’s therapists haven’t checked out. She been canceling sessions and not rescheduling.”

 

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

 

Danneel was packing the rest of her things when Jared walked in. “Lindsey’s taking a nap. She started to fall asleep during our Jersey Shore marathon so I pushed her to go to bed.”

 

“She probably needs the rest.” Jared took a deep breath. “Did she mention anything...”

 

“Hey, girl talk is girl talk.” Danneel smiled. She gave him a hug. “Jensen messaged. His mother is exhausted and the twins won’t take a nap. I need to get back and do the mom thing. I’ll stop by and see Linds before we fly out this weekend.”

 

“Thanks, Dee.”

 

“You’re planning on coming to Austin during the break, right? You haven’t been to your house since the holidays.”

 

Jared shrugged. “I don’t want to leave Linds right now. We’ll see how she’s doing in a few weeks. Maybe she’ll feel well enough to travel. Might be good for her to get away from all of this.”

 

Danneel nodded. “I think it’d be great for her. I told her she has to get out of the house.” Danneel made a face. “She shut down a little after I mentioned that.”

 

“She’ll be getting out more.” Jared said. “She’s going to start going to her physical therapy at the clinic. Linds needs to get out. You’re right.”

 

“That’s really good. Linds is a social creature. Locking herself away isn’t good for her.” Danneel touched his shoulder. “We’ll all have dinner before the kids and I fly out.

 

Jared saw her out and then started cooking. Lindsey wheeled herself in as he was putting chicken in the oven. “Hey.” She smiled softly at him.

 

“Hey, Darlin’,” Jared turned and looked at her. Her long dark hair fell around her shoulders in light curls and she looked relaxed. Jared decided not to push the issues concerning him just yet.

 

She bit her lip. “I can cut vegetables at the kitchen table.”

 

Jared nodded. “Sounds good.”

 

He told her some funny stories from set and she told him about her day with Danneel. By the time they ate, things seemed to be a little more normal.

 

He cleared the table and asked if she wanted to play a game or watch a movie.

 

“I’m enjoying talking.” Lindsey smiled. “My feet look pretty. I’ve been worried about clawing Steve or Stacy with my toes.”

 

Jared realized it was his opening. “How is therapy going?”

 

“Fine.” Lindsey told him. “I’m going to set the schedule tomorrow.”

 

Jared started to say something, but he decided to give her the benefit of the doubt this time. “Let me know. I think eventually you should start going to the clinic. You need to get out of the house sometimes.”

 

“I’ll talk to them about that too.” Lindsey looked nervous.

 

“Movie or game?”

 

“Can you help me shower and then watch a movie with me?” Lindsey asked. Jared thought he saw her cheeks flush.

 

“Of course.”

 

They had a routine down with her showers. Lindsey’s eyes met his several times and she smiled softly at him as he washed and rinsed her hair.

 

He wrapped the towel around her and carried her to the bed. He grabbed her clothes and helped her dress before going to his room to change. When he returned, she had Netflix ready to go. He started to take his seat next to the bed, but she stopped him.

 

“Can you...can you sit up here with me?”

 

“Linds?”

 

“I could really use a hug from my best friend.” Lindsey looked down. “You don’t have to, Jared. I’m just being...”

 

He moved to the bed and pulled her into his arms. He held her for several minutes and kissed the top of her head. He heard her crying, and tightened his arms around her. He rubbed her back with one hand as Lindsey cried for what seemed like hours.

 

She fell asleep in his arms, but Jared knew he couldn’t leave her. She needed him, whether she wanted to admit it, and he wanted to make sure that she knew he’d always be there. He swore he had her whisper, “Thank you” before he drifted off to sleep.

 

Lindsey woke in the middle of the night and realized that Jared was still with her. He was still there. She knew she had to get herself together. She needed to get her therapy back on track, start going outside more, and figure out what she was going to do about work. She moved to look at Jared and knew no matter what, the man holding her close that night would always be there for her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

 

When Lindsey woke the next morning, Jared was still there. He was awake and watching her.

 

“Hey,” she wasn’t sure what else to say.

 

“Hungry?”

 

Lindsey nodded. “I am, actually.”

 

Jared kissed her cheek. “I’ll go start breakfast.”

 

“Sounds good.” She was surprised when he picked her up and set her in the wheelchair. “Thanks.”

 

Their eyes met for a full minute. Jared knew she wasn’t just thanking him for picking her up. He finally smiled and winked before heading to the kitchen.

 

Lindsey joined him in the kitchen and was surprised to see him moving things around. “Jared?”

 

“Don’t get mad, but I know you want to help. I know you want to do things. I’m moving things around so that you can have some independence.”

 

“You’re really OCD when it comes to your kitchen. Are you...”

 

“I’m sure.” He smiled. “I think if you can get things you need, it’ll help you feel better. I will have to start traveling again for conventions so I want to make sure you will be okay.”

 

“I was thinking about that.” Lindsey admitted. “My friend Angela has been asking me daily if there’s anything I need. If you’re okay with it, I’m going to ask her to stay with me while you’re gone.”

 

“Sure.” Jared was back at the stove. “We probably should try the ramp into the shower before I leave. I don’t mind helping you, but you won’t have to wait for me.”

 

“I was thinking the same thing.” She admitted. “I do appreciate your help though.”

 

“Talk to Steve and Stacy and see what days you can go in for therapy. Clif can take you. Maybe you can even stop by the set, if you want. I know you might not be ready...”

 

“Let’s take things one day at a time.” Lindsey smiled at him.

 

They fell into a quiet routine. Jared bought a table low enough for Lindsey to be able to reach. He moved several appliances over so she could cook meals for them. She liked being able to do things for him, and for herself, but there were still several things he was helping her with.

 

Jared still helped her shower. When he let it slip to Jensen and Misha, his friends questioned him. He felt himself getting defensive, especially when he let it slip he was sleeping in the same bed.

 

“Jared, are things getting serious?” Misha asked.

 

“We’re friends. It’s not a big deal.”

 

Jensen shook his head. “It could become a big deal. We don’t want to see you or Linds get hurt.”

 

They were called to their marks before Jared could respond. There was a break for lunch and he raced to his trailer to take care of some phone calls he needed to make. As he entered the trailer, his phone rang.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Jared? Hi, it’s Stacy.”

 

“Hey, is everything okay? Linds is okay?”

 

“I don’t know. That’s what I was wondering. We set up her appointments and she’s canceled or just not shown up. It’s been over a week since we’ve heard from her at all. I was calling you since you’re her emergency contact….”

 

“Linds hasn’t been to therapy?” Jared asked.

 

“She started trying and had a bad day. Steve isn’t always the most patient with people, so I was going to start working with her exclusively...”

 

“I had no idea.” Jared ran his finger through his hair. “I’m sorry. She promised me she was going to set up a schedule and stick to it.”

 

“When we reached out before, we thought that maybe she was going to stick with it. I know it’s been hard for her, and I’m willing to work with her, but she’s got to give it her all.” Stacy took a deep breath. “I can come to the house and meet with both of you on Saturday morning. We can set up a schedule, but Lindsey has to understand that if she keeps doing this, I won’t be able to work with her. She’ll have to find someone else. Most therapists aren’t going to be as patient with her. It’s one thing to show up and not work, but when she doesn’t tell us she isn’t coming, someone else who is committed to their recovery could have that time.”

 

“I understand. I’m sorry. I really thought she was going. Her friend has been picking her up everyday.” Jared knew he had to confront Lindsey this time. “Saturday morning works. I start hiatus next week. I’ll have conventions every few weeks, but I’m not going overseas this year. I’ll be leaving for most on Saturday and will be back late Sunday or early Monday.”

 

“Maybe Lindsey will be more willing to do this if she knows it’s going to be just me.”

 

Jared managed to make it through the rest of the day without anyone noticing his mood had changed. He contemplated not going home right away but he knew he needed to. Lindsey had to make a few decisions and for once, he couldn’t ignore the situation any longer.

 

He entered the house and saw her reading in the chair he bought her. “Hey! How was your day?”

 

“It was going pretty well until Stacy called me and told me that you haven’t been to therapy. She said that she was going to work with you from now on. Something happened with Steve?”

 

“He’s an asshole.”

 

“Stacy isn’t. She’s willing to give you another chance.”

 

“Lovely.” Lindsey rolled her eyes.

 

“Damn it, what the hell is wrong with you?” Jared asked her. “You don’t want to be helpless. You hate depending on people, but you aren’t doing a damn thing to help your situation!”

 

“Fuck you, Jared! Do you think I like this?! I want to walk again. I want to take care of myself.”

 

“If you want to look for another place to do your physical therapy, I’ll help you do some research. We’ll go to a few places and see if there’s a place, or a therapist who sticks out for you.”

 

Lindsey shook her head. “Stacy is great.”

 

“So what’s the damn problem? Where the hell are you and Angela going everyday?!”

 

“No where! She’s come over twice.” Lindsey admitted. She looked down. “I...”

 

“You what?”

 

“I’m scared!” She cried. “I’m scared because I feel like I have no control over anything anymore!”

 

Jared took a few deep breaths before he spoke again. “There’s one week before the hiatus starts. I’ll be here two weeks before the next convention. You need to decide what you’re going to do. If you feel like you have no control over things, take the control back. Don’t bullshit me anymore, Lindsey. Do you want to walk again?” She didn’t respond. “Damn it, do you want to walk again?” She nodded, tears falling down her cheeks. “It’s all or nothing with this, Linds. You have to give it everything you have or you aren’t going to get anything from it.”

 

“Jared...”

 

“Linds, I need some time. I need to be alone for a little while.”

 

Jared slammed his bedroom door and sat on the bed. He was seeing everything he wanted to ignore. He knew he couldn’t turn a blind eye to what was, or wasn’t, happening. He realized that Lindsey needed to be pushed at this point.

 

He spent the next couple of hours reorganizing his books and movies. He heard a soft tapping at his bedroom door and opened it slowly.

 

“Jared, I’m sorry.” She wiped the tears from her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

 

Jared took a deep breath and kneeled in front of her. “Linds, you know I want what’s best for you...”

 

“Help me.” She pleaded. “Jared, I need help. I know what I need to do, but I’m scared. I’m so damn scared.”

 

He gently pulled her from the chair and into his arms. He held her close for a long time.

 

“I got you, Linds. I got you and you got this. I’m here. I’m all in. Whatever you need.”

 

“Jared, I….”

 

“You have to do your part. I know how hard this has been, but it’s time for you to get to work. No more excuses.”

 

“I’m ready.” Lindsey promised him. “I’m going to do this. I’m going to walk.”

 

Jared smiled at her. “I’ll do whatever you need me to do to make that happen.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

 

“You look exhausted.” Jared smiled at Lindsey on the drive home.

 

“I am.” She smiled back. “Stacy said when they were giving me two and three hours before, it was because I wasn’t doing anything. She said that we need to slow down.”

 

“How do you feel about that?”

 

Lindsey shrugged. “I’m slowly getting feeling back, but not below my knees. Dr. Thompson said that damaged nerves can take longer to repair sometimes. I’ve got an appointment Friday to see someone else about it.”

 

“I can take you.”

 

Lindsey smiled. “I’d love that.”

 

“I’m meeting Osric for lunch. Do you want to come with us?”

 

“Thanks, but I really am tired.” Lindsey told him.

 

“I’m glad you’re getting out more, but I do think going somewhere other than therapy would be good for you. I’m not going to push it. Yet.”

 

A few hours later, Jared came home again in a great mood. Osric had some great ideas for the next convention and Jared couldn’t wait to tell Lindsey what everyone was planning.

 

When he opened the door, the first thing he saw was her wheelchair overturned. “Shit! Lindsey? Linds?”

 

“I’m here.”

 

“What the hell happened?”

 

Lindsey pushed him away. “Jared, stop! I have to do this myself!”

 

“Let me help you, Babe.” He pleaded.

 

“I...I tried to stand. I fell. I know that it’s my fault that I haven’t made the progress I should have but I’ve been working my ass off for three weeks and I’m not making progress!” Lindsey cried. “I was so angry with myself because had I gotten into therapy when I should have, I could have been walking. I could be doing all the things I used to do. I don’t know about that now.” She looked into his eyes. “Jared, what if the damage is worse than we think. What if...”

 

“What?” Jared touched her cheek. “What is it, Baby?”

 

“What if I’m not supposed to walk again? What if the damage to the nerves never heals?”

 

Jared lifted her chin and looked into her eyes. “I don’t believe that, Linds. You are going to walk again.” He gently lifted her and set her on the couch.

 

“I’m scared things will never be the same. I’m scared that no one will ever look at me the same, especially you and Jen. You’re the best friends I’ve ever had in my life and I know things are different. I know your opinions of me have changed.”

 

Jared shook his head. “No, Linds. Jensen’s opinion of you hasn’t changed.”

 

Lindsey stared at him. “But yours has?”

 

Jared smiled. “I’ve fallen even more in love with you.”

 

She sat in stunned silence for several minutes. She smiled and started to talk, but he put a finger over her lips.

 

“Let’s talk about that later, please. Have you eaten?”

 

Lindsey nodded. “I ordered from Mario’s. Lots of leftovers if we get hungry later.”

 

Jared stood and pulled her into his arms. “I’ll heat something up after your shower.”

 

An hour later, they cuddled in Lindsey’s bed and Jared picked an old comedy they both loved. Lindsey moved closer to him. “Hey, Jare.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“What do you think about coming with me to PT tomorrow? Stacy said there’s some things I can do at home with help...”

 

“Absolutely.” He looked into her eyes. “Whatever you need.”

 

Lindsey surprised Stacy the next morning with her request. “I want to try and stand. Even for just a second.”

 

Stacy looked surprised. “Lindsey, I promise, it’ll happen...”

 

“Can I try? Please?”

 

Stacy saw the look in her eyes and nodded. After weeks of trying to work with Lindsey, she was finally seeing the determination she knew was there. “We’ll try it, but only for a few seconds. I don’t want to wear you out before we start.”

 

Lindsey wheeled over and prepared herself. She saw Jared start to walk over and smiled. “Wait right there. I got this.” She winked.

 

With Stacy’s help, Lindsey stood for a full four seconds before Stacy lowered her back into the chair. “We’re not pushing. Not yet.”

 

Jared moved next to her. “Linds, I’m proud at you.”

 

Lindsey touched his cheek and slowly moved her lips to his. “This is all because of you, Jared. Thank you.”

 

“You don’t have to thank you, Lindsey.”

 

“I do,” She kissed him again. “There’s one more thing. I forgot to tell you something.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“I love you, too.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

 

Jared delayed his flight as late as possible on Saturday night. He didn’t want to leave Lindsey but he knew he had to go. It would be just over twenty four hours, but he was worried.

 

“I’ll be fine!” Lindsey assured him. “I can shower by myself now, I can get myself something to eat. Stacy is actually going to come over tomorrow to try a few things she learned at her seminar last weekend. I’ll be fine, Jared. I promise.”

 

They were in bed already for the night, laying on their sides facing each other. Jared leaned over and kissed her. “I know, but I’m going to worry. I’m going to miss you.”

 

“I’ll miss you too, but you need to go. You need to do this for yourself, and for the fans. They need to see you and Jensen. Tell everyone I said hi and I’ll be back soon.”

 

“I will.” He touched her cheek. “Have you thought about going to Texas with me?”

 

“I’ll have to see how things look in a couple of weeks. I don’t want to skip therapy if I don’t have to. Maybe we can find a place for me to have a few sessions the two weeks we’d be there. I want to see Austin, and the house you never stay in.” She winked.

 

“I want to introduce you to my family. They’re anxious to meet you now.”

 

Lindsey nodded. “Eventually.”

 

They spent the next day quietly reading by the pool and then Jared grilled steaks for dinner. Lindsey was falling asleep when he left for the airport and he hoped she’d sleep in the next day.

 

He arrived in Pittsburgh at seven am and Clif greeted him with coffee. “Tell me you slept.”

 

“I did, actually. There weren’t many people on the flight.” He checked his phone and saw a late text from Lindsey. _I love you. Call me after the gold panel._

 

“Jensen messaged a few minutes ago. He’s awake and dressed. Asked if we’d grab some breakfast and bring it back.” Clif told him. “The schedule may be a little messed up. Sam had a family emergency and they were going to do a panel with her and Ruth in place of Linds. Sam had pictures before the gold panel, in place of Linds...”

 

“Jensen messaged me last night. Rob and Rich were trying to come up with something to fill that gap.” Usually Lindsey’s panel was just before Jensen and Jared’s afternoon panel. Sam’s emergency left a forty five minute gap that had to be filled. “I’m pretty sure no one would object to a break.”

 

They stopped by a fast food place on the way to the hotel. Jensen greeted him enthusiastically. It was rare for them not to see each other during the hiatus. Jared usually spent that time in Texas. “It’s good to see you.”

 

“You too.” Jared smiled. “Lindsey says hi.”

 

“Dee said that you two might come to Texas.”

 

“We’re talking about it. Some things have happened. I didn’t have a chance to talk to you about it….” They were interrupted by Rob and Rich. They had a crazy idea for the forty five minutes extra minutes. Jensen and Jared agreed to it and hoped that the con organizers would too.

 

“What’s going on? How’s her therapy?” Jensen asked once they were alone again.

 

Jared smiled. “She’s working so damn hard. I think she’s going to be walking really soon.”

 

“Really?” Jensen asked.

 

“Ever since the day Stacy called me, she’s worked so damned hard. Things have been amazing.”

 

Jensen stopped eating and looked at him. “Amazing how?”

 

“We’re so much closer than we’ve ever been. Things are really coming together….”

 

They were interrupted again before the conversation could continue. There was no time to talk about before the gold panel.

 

When Jared walked onto the stage and saw the first few rows filled with the gold pass holders. He stopped and smiled. These people were part of the extended family he, Jensen, and the rest of the cast were lucky enough to have.

 

“Good morning!” Jared waved to the crowd.

 

Once the screams settled down, and Jensen and Jared joked around with each other a bit before they took the first question.

 

“Hey, guys!” She was younger than a lot of the others. “I was wondering how Lindsey’s feeling.”

 

“She’s doing great!” Jared smiled. “She’s working really hard. Linds is looking forward to getting back to work and back to coming to see all of you!”

 

As soon they exited the stage, Jared called Lindsey. She answered on the first ring. “Morning, Sweetie. How was the panel?”

 

“Great! First question was about you.”

 

Lindsey smiled on her end. “Really? They have thirty minutes with you and Jen and they ask about me?”

 

“Babe, they love you. Everyone misses you.” He was being rushed to his meet and greet. “Hey, I have to go. I’ll call you after my solo ops. I love you, Linds.”

 

“Love you, Jared.”

 

Jensen stopped walking and looked back. “Did I hear you say...”

 

“I was getting to that before everyone kept interrupting us.” Jared’s smile was huge. “Things have changed in a huge way.”

 

“Obviously.” Jensen said. “We’ll talk about it later.”

 

Later came a couple of hours later while they were having lunch. Jensen took a deep breath. “I’m your best friend, Jared. I know you love her. I know she loves you. I’m just worried that maybe anything that happens between the two of you right now might end with one or both of you getting hurt.”

 

“Why would we get hurt?”

 

“The two of you had feelings before. I realize that. I don’t want either of you to doubt that. I don’t want Lindsey to think you’re with her because of the accident. I don’t want you to think she’s with you because of all you’ve done. You’re her hero and savior, Jared. I know you love her, Man, and I’m positive she loves you. I just want you both to be sure.”

 

Jared carried those words with him the rest of the day. Jensen was worried, but Jared realized the concerns were valid. While waiting for his luggage at the airport, Jared considered getting a hotel room for a few days to think about things. He loved Lindsey, but he didn’t want the doubts Jensen spoke of to cause them problems later on.

 

He decided to go home. He missed Lindsey more than he thought possible. It was six in the morning and he was surprised when she greeted him as he walked inside.

 

“Hey!” Her smile was huge. “I missed you!”

 

“I missed you.” He kissed her quickly. “I’m going to take a nap.”

 

“I made some breakfast. The waffle maker has been wonderful. Thank you.”

 

“I’m not hungry.” He saw her face fall. “Linds, I think we need to cool things a bit.”

 

“Cool things?” Lindsey looked at him. “You don’t want to be together anymore.”

 

“I do, but we need to make sure that we’re both in this for the right reasons.”

 

Lindsey shook her head. “We love each other, Jared. We started off as friends and it’s grown from there….”

 

“I’m just scared that one day, you’ll realize that you could have had someone else, anyone else….”

 

“I don’t want anyone else.” Linds fought tears. “Jared, I love you. I always have. Jared, I’ve been in love with you for three years!”  


“Wh..what?”

 

“Do you remember the Christmas party Misha hosted before we all went home for the holidays? I wore a red dress. I was late because there was an accident….”

 

“I left early. I’d filmed five days straight and was exhausted.” Jared looked at her. “I went to see you. I knew it could be a while before you were back….”

 

“My feelings for you were here long before all of this.” She looked around. “I’m worried that you feel like you have to be with me because of the accident.”

 

“No,” Jared moved next to her. “God, no. I love you, Lindsey. I love you so much.”

 

Lindsey took his face in her hands. “I love you. You’ve been here for me for a long time. It wasn’t something you had to do. I never expected it. You’ve been here for me since the day we met.”

 

Jared kissed her then. After a few minutes, he pulled her into lap and the kissing continued or a few minutes before he felt her tugging at his shirt.

 

“Linds?”

 

“Don’t you think we’ve waited long enough?” She smiled. He smiled back and nodded before gently standing up and carrying her to the bedroom.

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contain smut!!!

**Chapter Twelve**

This Chapter contains smut!

 

 

Jared gently laid her down on the bed and smiled down at her. “I love you, Linds.”  


“I love you, Jared.” She reached for him. “If this is too much, too quick...”

 

“I want this too.” Jared pulled his shirt over his head. “Are you sure?”

 

Lindsey nodded and pulled her tank top over her head. “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

 

Jared leaned down and kissed her softly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“You won’t.” Lindsey whispered between kisses. “I trust you.”

 

He moved his hands slowly down her body as he kissed her skin softly. He was careful not to hurt her as he removed her clothing slowly. He stood up and unbuttoned his jeans before stopped. “Lindsey, once we go there...”

 

“There’s no going back. I don’t want to go back, Jared. Let’s move forward together.” She reached for him. “This is what I want, Jared.”

 

He stripped the rest of his clothes and gently moved on the bed. His lips caught hers in the softest of kisses. “If you need me to stop, I will.”

 

“I know, but I won’t need or want that.”

 

Their hands explored each other’s bodies for several minutes while they found a position comfortable for both of them. Lindsey pulled him on top of her and looked in his eyes. She gave him a soft smile, letting him know she was ready.

 

Jared moved his hand between their bodies. He slowly moved a finger into her already wet folds. He worked her clit slowly, as not to overwhelm her at once. Jared was holding back. He had envisioned this moment a million times but he didn’t want to hurt her.

 

“More, please.” She begged, urging him to move enough she could wrap her hand around his hard cock. Her hand moved slowly, but he knew the sweet torture would kill him before too long.

 

Lindsey’s body shook as the orgasm took her over with no warning. Jared kissed her again as he worked her through the end of it.

 

“Are you ready for me?” He asked.

 

“Yes,” She was breathing heavy. “Please, Jared.”

 

He lined himself up and gently pushed himself inside her. He stopped to allow Lindsey to adjust to his size and the stretch, but she urged him to move. Soon, they were completely connected and he saw the tears in her eyes.

 

“No, no,” He shook his head. “No tears.”

 

“Tears of happiness and disbelief.” She moved one of her hands to his face and reached for his hand with the other. “I have thought about this moment for so long.”

 

“So have I.” Jared kissed her again. “You have no idea.”

 

They moved together as one, each declaring their love for one another over and over. Jared felt her wet walls clinch and he smiled. “Together, Baby.”

 

“Together.” Lindsey nodded. They clung to each other as they went over the edge at the same time. Jared held himself over her for several minutes before he slowly pulled out and rolled to his side.

 

“Lindsey, you are so beautiful.”

 

Lindsey touched his hair. “You are amazing. I love you, Jared.”

 

“I love you.” He leaned over to kiss her again and felt something against his leg. He moved the thin sheet and saw her leg moving slightly. “Linds?”

 

“I feel it. I...I wanted to tell you earlier. It started this morning.” She smiled. “I’m getting more feeling back.”

 

Jared sat up and pulled her closer to him. “A lot is changing here, huh?”

 

“I think so. A lot of it has been good though.” Lindsey smiled back at him.

 

“I was thinking about another change.”

 

“Oh? What’s that?”

 

“You moving into my room and sharing my bed on a more permanent basis.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

 

They slept on and off, made love often, and after a long hot bath, slept together in Jared’s bed for the first time. He helped her get ready for therapy the next morning and dropped her off. Jared planned on going to the grocery store and swinging by her place to grab some more clothes and a few other things she wanted. Lindsey planned to call movers that afternoon and arrange to have the rest of her things packed up and moved to Jared. They discussed it several times and both knew this was the most natural thing for them. They were in love and wanted a future together.

 

“Stacy, I have something to show you.” Lindsey had more feeling in her left leg. She lifted it slowly. Stacy cheered and told her that there were some new things they could start working on. Lindsey agreed and told her what she had in mind.

 

“I don’t want to tell Jared though. I want it to be a surprise.”

 

Jared arrived just before noon and asked if she wanted to go to lunch. Lindsey almost said no, but then nodded. “I wouldn’t mind sitting outside for a little bit.”

 

“I was thinking about a few things. You said you were ready to do a live stream?”

 

Lindsey nodded. “I think maybe this weekend. I need time to decided exactly what I plan to say. I was thinking about a tee shirt campaign. I just need to find the right organization.”

 

Jared nodded. “I know you mentioned helping kids who are going through the same thing. There’s a home close to Misha’s place in Washington. He told me about it this weekend. The women who run it take kids in and help them adjust. All of the kids are foster children.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Some were born with physical disabilities. Most were injured. Anyway, Misha heard about it and stopped by. He knew you were looking, so he suggested we drive down one day and visit. He was extremely impressed.”

 

Lindsey nodded. “Get the information and I’ll call. I’m pretty lucky that I don’t have to worry about the financial side of things. I know there’s a lot of people here who are getting help by the government but they can’t afford to do the things you did for me.”

 

“Whatever you do, it’ll be amazing and it’ll help a lot of people. No doubt about that.”

 

Jared drove to a cafe they went to frequently when filming downtown. Lindsey picked a table outside and Jared kissed her before walking inside to order lunch. Lindsey smiled at him as a few girls said hi and he stopped to talk to them. Lindsey loved the way Jared paid attention to the fans. He listened to everything they said to him.

 

He winked at her before going inside to order. She saw the girls look at her and she smiled at them. She saw one girl lean toward the other and whisper. Lindsey tried not to let it bother her, but she couldn’t help but feel self conscious.

 

She noticed other people watching her, some sympathetically, some annoyed. Her eyes went back to the girls. One was looking into the cafe, not so subtly taking pictures. The other was watching Lindsey and nudged her friend when she saw her watching. Lindsey looked down at her phone, but she felt eyes on her. She even heard someone whisper, “That’s the one who got hurt on set. Did you see Jared all over her? Who knew that’s all it would take to get his attention?”

 

Lindsey pushed away from the table and wheeled toward the car. She wasn’t ready for this. She knew she needed to get out of the house more often, but she wasn’t ready for people to stare, comment, or try to speculate about her relationship with Jared. She wasn’t sure she was ready for people to know about her relationship. The network would want them to wait before going public. It was better for the show.

 

Jared parked a distance from the cafe, claiming the walk to and from would be good for them. Lindsey was shaking as she continued toward the parking spot. People stared, some looked around to see if she was alone. She crossed a street and heard someone scream, “Hurry up!” before she made it to the other side.

 

She got to the sidewalk, but something caught her wheel and she felt the chair tilt. Lindsey felt the color drain from her face and prepared to land in a heap on the ground, but she felt a jolt and realized her chair was upright.

 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Jared was out of breath, holding two bags and and two bottles of water. “I came out and you were leaving.”

 

“I can’t….I’m not ready. I want to go home. I need to go home.”

 

“Linds?” Jared moved in front of her and looked in her eyes. He recognized the fear and panic. He saw that in the mirror often. “Okay, let’s go home.”

 

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I thought it was a good idea. I wanted to go with you. I thought it would be a good idea.”

 

Jared kissed the top of her head. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay. Let’s go home, Babe.”

 

Lindsey was quiet when he helped her into the car. Jared put the bags in the backseat and her chair in the trunk. He stopped and sent a quick text. Briana planned to stop by to talk to Lindsey about a couple of ideas, but Jared knew it wasn’t a good day for that. She needed to go home, unwind, and feel safe again.

 

He opened the door and heard her sobbing. “Babe?” He immediately reached for her. “What happened?”

 

“Those girls were staring and someone said something about my accident being all it took to get you...I felt trapped. I felt like I needed to get away from there. I don’t want people staring at me like that! I don’t want people to feel sorry for me-and there were a lot of those looks, Jared. Don’t tell me you really didn’t see it! I’m working so hard. Those people don’t know that, obviously, but they’re all so quick to make assumptions...”

 

“Take a deep breath.” Jared smoothed her hair. “We’re going home. We’re going to eat lunch outside, and we’re going to relax.”

 

“I have to start getting out...”

 

“You will.” Jared promised her. “You’re going to start getting out, but we’re going to take it slow. It may take some time, but you’ll be ready to take on the world again and I’ll be right there with you. Because I love you.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> I don't know if there's an organization with the name I decided to use. I just needed to name it and that was the first thing I came up with...

**Chapter Fourteen**

 

Over the next few weeks, Jared started taking Lindsey to small, quiet spots after therapy. They had picnics by lakes, dinner at small, hidden places, and eventually, Lindsey asked him to take her to a movie. She almost immediately regretted the decision but Jared gave her a small smile and wink.

 

Lindsey spoke to Nelle and Annie, the women who ran the home Misha told them about. They were best friends and Annie had suffered a broken back as a child. Nelle stood by her and helped her through the therapies and several surgeries she endured. After several phone conversations, she and Jared arranged to drive to Washington and spend the weekend.

 

“I’m really excited.” Lindsey told Jared. “Nelle said they could really use the help.”

 

Jared nodded. “Misha plans to throw something in GISH for the home also.”

 

“We have everything ready to launch. I know I probably should have gone down there before I did that, but I know this is a good idea. I know that these kids need the help.”

 

“I’m proud of you.” Jared reached for her hand. “Annie’s Angels is a great organization. I know this campaign is going to be incredible.”

 

The drive took less than two hours. They met Misha at the home and Lindsey smiled when she saw the ramps. “We’re at the right place.”

 

Once settled in her chair, Jared wheeled her to the porch as two women stepped outside. Misha greeted them and introduced them to Nelle and Annie.

 

“It’s so good to finally meet you!” Lindsey said. “I’m so excited to meet the kids and see everything.” She looked back at Jared. “We brought some gifts, also.”

 

Two hours later, Jared and Misha sat on a bench and watched Lindsey with the kids. She was holding a small child who was injured in a car accident a year earlier. Jared watched her and smiled at how good she was with all of the children.

 

“She’s looking better.” Misha commented.

 

Jared nodded. “She’s doing better. Therapies going well, she’s getting out more often, and...”

 

“The two of you are doing well?”

 

“We’re amazing.” Jared smiled. “Things are really coming together for us. For her.” Lindsey was waving at him and motioned toward the car. Jared nodded. “I need help.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Lindsey has shirts for you, Vicki, and the kids. She brought shirts for Nelle and Annie also. I’m pretty sure she’s going to launch the campaign as soon as she can.”

 

The men grabbed several bags from the car and returned to hear laughter from Lindsey and the kids. She thanked him and looked at the kids.

 

“I’m not sure if Nelle or Annie told you all, but I want to do something to help Annie’s Angels and all of you.” She reached in the bag and pulled out the tee shirt. “I’m going to sell these tee shirts and all proceeds will be donated to Annie’s Angels.”

 

The shirts came in several colors and had the words, ‘You got this!’ written on them. Lindsey smiled at the kids squealed with delight as they chose what color they wanted, and then were all given hoodies and other items with the phrase.

 

“Why that?” One of the older kids asked.

 

Lindsey reached for Jared’s hand. “I’ve heard those words a lot since my accident. It took some time for me to realize everyone was right. I thought it might a good message for anyone having a hard time.”

 

Misha and Jared helped the kids look through the bags while Lindsey gave Nelle and Annie a few other things. “Jared and I stopped by a couple of placed when we got to town.” She handed the gift certificates over. “I know these will come in handy and I can’t wait to start the campaign!”

 

As they drove back to Misha’s a few hours later, Lindsey made a few phone calls and was told that everything was ready. A few minutes after arriving at Misha’s, she added the link to all of her profiles and asked Jared and Misha to join her outside for her first live stream since the accident.

 

“I’m nervous.” She looked at Jared. “I haven’t done this in months. Always with you and Jensen on set screwing around.”

 

“It’ll be okay.” Misha assured her. “This time you have Jared and me screwing around.”

 

“Lovely.” Lindsey giggled. “Okay, here we go…..Is it working?”

 

“Yeah,” Jared started laughing. “There’s a few people in here.”

 

“Oh, should I wait? How long do you two usually wait?”

 

“Go ahead.” Misha encouraged her.

 

“Hey everyone! I know it’s been awhile. Thank you for your messages and encouragement. I’m doing a lot better and I learned yesterday that I will be returning to the show about three episodes into the season.”

 

“We can’t wait!” Jared said.

 

“I’m here with Jared and Misha and I have something really exciting to share with all of you.” She moved the camera to show her shirt. “I was really fortunate to have the love and support of some really amazing people.” She looked at Jared and smiled. “I didn’t always deserve their patience and love, but they didn’t give up on me.”

 

“We never would.” Jared kissed the top of her head.

 

“We all go through hard times in our lives. Sometimes it’s so overwhelming that you don’t feel things will ever be good again. I’m here to tell you, you got this.”

 

She went on to explain the campaign, Annie’s Angels, and thank everyone again, and then ended the stream laughing because she didn’t know how to shut it off.

 

“That was even worse than before Jensen learned what he was doing!” Jared laughed.

 

“Don’t even tell him that!” Lindsey swatted his shoulder. “You know I’m going to be at Van Con.”

 

“I heard rumors.” Jared smiled at her. “You’re sure? You’re ready?”

 

Lindsey nodded, thinking about the phone conversation with Jensen the day before. “I’m more than ready.”

 

“I’ll be next to you as much as possible.”

 

Misha hated to interrupt but felt they needed to know. “Jared, you kissed Linds during the stream?”

 

“I...yeah.”

 

“Well, just so you know, the fandom is going crazy.”

 

“Shit.” Lindsey looked panicked.

 

Misha shook his head. “They’re happy, Linds. My favorite comment so far is ‘about fucking time!’”

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song used Halo by Beyonce....lyrics worked for this chapter and the story...

**Chapter Fifteen**

 

 

Lindsey sat quietly in her spot just off the back of the stage. She saw Jared pacing, and wheeled over to him.

 

“Babe?”

 

“I’ve only played a few times….”

 

“You’re going to be amazing.” Lindsey kissed him. “I’ll be right back here when you finish.”

 

Jared nodded. “You’re okay? You’re not too tired?”

 

“I’m fine!” Lindsey smiled. “Clif has barely let me do anything.”

 

“This is a lot, Lindsey. We’re all always exhausted anyway. I know you still get tired a little faster than you used to.”

 

She touched his cheeks. “Hey,” He looked into her eyes. “I got this.”

 

“Yeah,” he kissed her softly. He looked at the beautiful woman in front of him. Her long, dark hair was curled and hung loose around her shoulders. Her dark eyes met his hazel and smiled. “I love you.”

 

“I love you.”

 

“Hey, it’s time!” Jensen grabbed Jared. Lindsey caught the wink and saw Matt and Clif standing close by.

 

“You’re ready?” Matt asked.

 

Lindsey nodded. “It’s been so hard not to show him I can do this.”

 

“There’s a stool on stage for you.” Clif reminded her. “Sit on the damn thing!”

 

“I will!” Lindsey promised.

 

She heard the screams after Jensen and Jared were announced and they walked onto the stage. She nodded and Clif helped her stand.

 

“Whoa!” Briana’s mouth dropped opened. “What’s going on?”

 

“It’s a surprise.” Lindsey smiled.

 

Kim shook her head. “You’re not supposed to go out until later.”

 

“What?”

 

“Jared, he told...” Kim stopped. “Shit. You worked this out with Jensen and Rob, didn’t you?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Clif gently nudged her. “We have to get Linds where she needs to be.”

 

He and Matt helped her up the small stairs and as soon as the music started, she took the mic from Matt.

 

Jared’s nerves were taking over. He loved playing music, but he was still nervous about playing in front of large groups. When Jensen turned to the band to start, Jared was surprised. This wasn’t the song they were supposed to play.

 

He looked at Jensen and saw the huge smile. Jared saw the others onstage smiling. Jensen looked at Jared and pointed to the stage entrance.

 

Jared looked over and saw Matt first. He then saw Lindsey.

 

Walking.

 

His eyes widened and he set the guitar down. He walked to her. “You...”

 

“Surprise.” She winked. “I’m going to sing for you.”

 

“You are?” Jared asked.

 

“I probably should acknowledge the audience.” She was still smiling. He helped her sit on the stool and stepped back.

 

“Hey yall!” Lindsey looked into the crowd. “Surprise!” The cheers were loud and Lindsey was shocked by the standing ovation. “Please, please, sit down! I’m going to sing a song. I’m pretty sure someone out there knew Jensen wasn’t going to sing this one.” Everyone laughed. “Okay, here goes nothing.” Lindsey looked at Jared as she started to sing.

 

 _Remember those walls I built_  
Well, baby, they're tumbling down  
And they didn't even put up a fight  
They didn't even make a sound 

 

She reached her hand out to Jared and he walked over and took her hand as he kneeled in front of her. Lindsey forgot about everyone else as she sang only to the man she was madly in love with.

 

 _I found a way to let you win_  
But I never really had a doubt  
Standing in the light of your halo  
I got my angel now

 _It's like I've been awakened_  
Every rule I had you break it  
It's the risk that I'm taking  
I ain't never gonna shut you out

 _Everywhere I'm looking now_  
I'm surrounded by your embrace  
Baby, I can see your halo  
You know you're my saving grace

 _You're everything I need and more_  
It's written all over your face  
Baby, I can feel your halo  
Pray it won't fade away 

 

Jared kissed her hand. Lindsey heard the crowd singing and pulled him up for a kiss. She knew if there were any doubts lingering in anyone’s minds, she was putting them to rest.

 

 _Hit me like a ray of sun_  
Burning through my darkest night  
You're the only one that I want  
Think I'm addicted to your light

 _I swore I'd never fall again_  
But this don't even feel like falling  
Gravity can't forget  
To pull me back to the ground again

 _Feels like I've been awakened_  
Every rule I had you break it  
The risk that I'm taking  
I'm never gonna shut you out

 _Everywhere I'm looking now_  
I'm surrounded by your embrace  
Baby, I can see your halo  
You know you're my saving grace

 _You're everything I need and more_  
It's written all over your face  
Baby, I can feel your halo  
Pray it won't fade away

 

Lindsey heard others on stage singing. Jared pulled Jensen down and whispered something. Lindsey waited for the song to end and was surprised when Jared took the mic.

 

“Apparently you and I were both planning something special for tonight.” Jared reached in his pocket and pulled a small box out. Lindsey’s eyes widened and she started crying. Jared shook his head. “I haven’t said anything yet!”

 

“But that’s...”

 

The crowd had to be quieted down. Jared took a deep breath and held Lindsey’s hand. “I love you. I love the person you are and the person I am when I’m with you. I’m proud of you. You fought your way back and you’ve kicked it in the ass.” He opened the box. “Lindsey Wilburn, will you marry me?”

 

She was crying and could only shake her head yes. The room erupted in excitement before Rich once again quieted everyone down.

 

“She did say yes, didn’t she?” Rich asked.

 

“Damn right I said yes!” She laughed. Jared kissed her again. He turned to Jensen and Rob, who both nodded. Jared took the mic once again.

 

“My fiance and I are going to say goodnight. We’ll see you all bright and early!”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song used - Make you Feel my love (Garth Brooks or Adele, but I admit I've never heard her version...)

**Epilogue**

 

Jared paced the back room for the hundredth time. “Everyone’s here? Everything is ready?”

 

Jensen grabbed him. “Everyone is here. Everything is ready. Lindsey is ready.”

 

“I can’t wait to see her.” Jared smiled.

 

Jensen grabbed his shoulder. “You will in a few minutes.”

 

He led Jared to Briana, who became ordained online just for the occasion.

 

“You ready?” Briana looked at him.

 

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” Jared looked at her. “Did Lindsey...”

 

“She’s fine! You’re fine! Calm down!” Jensen patted his back. Jared’s father and brother smiled at him. “She’s coming. Misha and Mark are with her...”

 

Jared took a deep breath and looked around. It wasn’t a huge ceremony. Lindsey wanted family and close friends. He realized that by family, Lindsey meant the people she met through the show. Not everyone was able to come, but Jared knew she was thrilled with those who had made the trip to Texas.

 

Briana smiled. “Text from the back! They’re heading out.”

 

Jared moved next to her and waited for Mark and Misha to walk Lindsey in. She was moving around better, but walking more than a few feet at a time without help wore her out. He was worried about her standing during the ceremony and insisted they bring a stool in so she could sit down if she needed to.

 

He heard the music change and turned to see Lindsey standing between his two friends. She smiled and their eyes locked. Slowly, she started toward him. Jared froze when she stopped halfway to him and nodded to the men. They each kissed her cheek and took a step back. Jared was confused and then realized she was walking to him. Lindsey was walking toward him with a huge smile on her face.

 

“She’s been working on that.” Jensen whispered. “She wanted to walk down the aisle by herself.”

 

Tears were already flowing by the time she reached him. He leaned forward and kissed the top of her head before taking her hands.

 

Briana planned a very short ceremony. Jared and Lindsey decided to go with traditional vows for the ceremony. They had special words for each other that they decided to wait and share in private. Lindsey’s eyes stayed locked on his and before she knew it, Jared leaned down to kiss her.

 

“Ladies and gents, Mr. and Mrs. Padalecki!” Briana smiled. “It’s about fucking time!” Everyone laughed as Jared kissed her again.

 

“She’s right. It’s about time.” He whispered.

 

Lindsey smiled. “Perfect timing.”

 

“Are you okay? Are you tired?”

 

“I’m fine. I’ve been practicing this for weeks. I’m not running marathons. Yet. I’m walking though.”

 

“This was my surprise?” Jared asked.

 

Lindsey nodded. “Part of it.”

 

Jared didn’t get a chance to ask her about it. His family approached them, then their friends. They spent several minutes with everyone while they waited for the reception hall to open.

 

“You look beautiful.” Jared whispered when they finally sat down.”

 

“You’ve mentioned that. A few thousands times.” She smiled at him.

 

“Well, you do.” Jared kissed her. “I love you so much.”

 

“I love you.” Lindsey saw Jensen talking to the DJ. He turned and nodded. “So surprise number two...”

 

“What? Already?”

 

“Ladies and gentleman, please direct your attention to the dance floor as Mr. and Mrs. Padalecki have their first dance as husband and wife.”

 

“Our first...” Jared looked at her. “Linds?”

 

She stood up again and smiled at him. “Mr. Padalecki, may I have this dance?”

 

“Absolutely.” Jared stood and took her hand. The music started as they reached the floor.

 

 _When the rain is blowing in your face_  
And the whole world is on your case  
I could offer you a warm embrace  
To make you feel my love 

 

Lindsey looked into his eyes. “I wanted to walk down the aisle to you and I wanted to dance. I know we said we’d skip this, but I realized I really didn’t want to.”

 

“I’m glad,” He pulled her close. “I am so proud of you, Mrs. Padalecki.”

 

“I’m proud of you, Mr. Padalecki.” Lindsey smiled as they kissed again.

 

 _I'd go hungry; I'd go black and blue_  
And I'd go crawling down the avenue  
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do  
To make you feel my love 

 

Lindsey sang to Jared as they danced. He closed his eyes and knew they’d both remember this day, and this moment, for the rest of their lives.

 

 _I could make you happy, make your dreams come true_  
There's nothing that I wouldn't do  
Go to the ends of this Earth for you  
To make you feel my love, oh yes  
To make you feel my love 

 

“Thank you for my surprises.” Jared looked into her eyes. “Today has been perfect.”

 

“There’s one more surprise. This one no one else knows about.” Lindsey bit her lip. “I wasn’t sure until this morning.”

 

“You weren’t sure about whether it would be a surprise or you’d have it….”

 

“I wasn’t sure if there was a surprised.” Lindsey smiled. “I’m pregnant.”

 

 

**The End**


End file.
